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  Maybe then, I can have all of them instead of having to choose.

  Chapter 15

  Sebastian

  “T hat’s the only way this can happen,” I say.

  “Then we need another plan,” Joel says. “And we better make it quick before Clarissa gets back.”

  “If you want to protect her during this war, then you have to find a place off-site to keep her. We have to assume that with the way the scouts have plotted out the land that they know where you guys are.”

  “They don’t.”

  “Really? Because I came into contact with a trap that almost took me down less than a mile outside of camp. If they came in that far to set a trap, they know where you are. What with all the damn smoke and the smell of fucking food for miles,” I say.

  “Giving up this hideaway isn’t a choice. This is our home, and I’m not going to let you or any other Primal decimate it for your own battle purposes.”

  “Then you can’t keep Clarissa safe.”

  “Yes, we can. You know we can. She might have Primal traits, but she’s still human.”

  “You aren’t even willing to give up your home for her, Joel. We’ve given up everything. Our livelihoods. Our own homes. Our futures to make sure this takes place. And you can’t even give up a cottage?”

  “This place isn’t just home, Wolf. It’s triage for the wounded and a place for the women who aren’t training to fight to keep the children of our village safe.”

  “What did you call me?” I growl.

  “Leaving the village vulnerable isn’t an option. Period. Clarissa can stay back with us, and we will keep her in the centermost part of it and surround her, but we aren’t giving this over to anyone. Especially you.”

  “This place is easily defendable,” I say. “If we lure them onto the turf me and the guys know best, we can take them down. They might have the edge of it plotted, but not the inner workings of it. We can win this if we fight them on ground we’re familiar with.”

  “Then you better find somewhere else to familiarize yourself with, and quick. Because we aren’t going anywhere, and you aren’t taking this village.”

  “I’ve got ways of taking what I need,” I say.

  “And I’m sure that’s why Clarissa claims you as her boyfriend, right?” he asks.

  I take a step toward him and ready myself for a fight. Her name doesn’t get to fall from his face any longer. But I feel a strong hand plant squarely into my chest, stopping me in my tracks. It’s Theo, and his eyes are prying and full of warning.

  “Tone it down. Clarissa could come back at any second, and we need to have this figured out,” he says.

  “Fine,” I snarl. “But keep that asshole away from me.”

  “Don’t worry. Not a problem,” Joel says.

  “They still fighting?” Toshi asks.

  “Aren’t they always?” Theo asks.

  “We need to talk about this since Joel won’t give up the village,” I say.

  “You’re still on that?” Theo asks. “I told you it wouldn’t work.”

  “Wolves don’t listen,” Toshi says. “Unlike their domesticated counterparts.”

  “Say that again and watch what happens,” I say growling.

  “Calm down,” Theo says. “Let’s get another plan in motion.”

  “Fine. Since the human here doesn’t want to do whatever it takes to protect Clarissa, we need another plan,” I say. “A plan that doesn't include luring them into the village.”

  “What about traveling to another side of the forest?” Theo asks. “In theory, if they are still looking for Clarissa, then they’ll follow her trail.”

  “She isn’t coming with us. She isn’t fighting,” I say.

  “I’m not saying she is. But if we take her out and lay her scent everywhere then have her camouflaged until the war is over, they’ll follow her laid scent. We can draw them away from the village, confuse them in the forest, and use guerilla war tactics to take them down,” Theo says.

  “I’m impressed,” I say. “I didn’t know you knew about war.”

  “Bears know about it. We just don’t engage in it. Peaceful tactics are what we strive for. But if those fail, we know how to fight. And win.”

  “I like Theo’s idea,” Toshi says. “But there is another option.”

  “What?” I ask.

  “You could take the fight to them,” Joel says.

  We all turn our heads towards the human and I resist the urge to rip his fucking face off.

  “That’s what you were going to say, right?”

  “Yes,” Toshi says. “It was. We do still have the option of taking the fight to them. With Vlad with us and his knowledge of the corridors, we can surprise them with one group while another group heads off to find Kyle and Vlad’s father. Or did we forget about the two people we were freeing in the process?”

  I grumble at the sound of his name. I don’t like the fact that he’s still alive. I can respect his strength for it in whatever tactic he chose to survive. Or his willingness to put up with the pain he probably went through to be transformed into whatever he was. But Clarissa’s mine. She smells like mine, she’s marked as if she’s mine, and she gravitates to me. Even if she fights it. Even if she screams out “no” for it. Her Primal instincts are growing by the day, and her body wants to yield to my command. It wants to settle into a natural rhythm of being mine.

  And I’m not sure how Kyle will take that once we’re all reunited.

  “That’s something to consider,” Theo says. “If we lure them away from the village with Clarissa’s scent, we do still have to get to the Council building and keep our promise.”

  “Is there any way we can do that without having to go back there?” I ask. “Because it didn’t go well the last time we were there. And I’m not sure if any of you have experienced, but when Clarissa and I—”

  “Really?” Joel asks. “You’re going to bring this up now?”

  “Shut up, or I’ll toss you out into the cold,” I say.

  “Then I’ll kick you out and keep Clarissa with us.”

  “Trust me, if Sebastian can’t control her, you can’t either,” Toshi says.

  “Watch your mouth, Cat.”

  “Tone it down,” Theo says. “What were you saying, Sebastian?”

  “Clarissa’s stronger. Her strength grows by the day. At first, I thought it was pure desire. Wolves get very strong during their mating rituals.”

  “Fuck me,” Joel says.

  “Not on your life, she won’t,” I say. “But she overpowered me in bed. Had me pinned. And it isn’t the first show of strength she’s had.”

  “I know,” Toshi says. “But I thought it was just me.”

  “What do you mean?” Theo asks.

  “I saw her thrashing around on the couch with a nightmare, and I raced over to try and wake her up. I placed my hand on her arm, and she clamped down onto it so hard I lost blood flow.”

  Theo’s eyes widened as I snorted through my nostrils.

  “It isn’t just you, Sebastian. Clarissa’s much stronger than before,” Toshi says.

  “But why?” Joel asks. “Why would she change like that? Is she still morphing or something?”

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about, so shut up and let the adults talk,” I say. “And I don’t know. But it does make me curious with the changing of her scent.”

  “Has anyone asked her about it?” Theo asks.

  “What the hell are you guys talking about?” Joel asks.

  “You really should hush,” Toshi says.

  “Good kitty,” I say with a grin.

  “You’re treading on thin ice right now,” Toshi asks. “Be careful.”

  “Or what? You’ll purr me to death?” I ask.

  “No. But I will lure you into a trap, decapitate your head, and roll it over to our enemy to put on a stake.”

  “Enough!” Theo bellows.

  The entire cottage shakes, and things begin to f
all off the walls. Bowls crash to the floor and I can hear Josie scrambling from her room. She comes into the kitchen and takes a look at the pot stewing on the stove before shooting all of us a look.

  “Sorry,” Theo says. “The children were bickering.”

  “Duly noted. But can we try to keep the yelling down until after dinner? If that pot spills over, you guys are going hungry tonight,” she says.

  “We’ll keep it down,” Theo says. “And thank you. For always feeding us. We really appreciate it.”

  “It’s not a problem,” Josie says. “Just try not to bring down the roof, please? I worked hard to fix it a few months ago.”

  We all watch as Josie comes over to stir the pot. She lifts the lid off the bubbling liquid. I can see it spilling over as she stirs. Filled with meat and potatoes and vegetables that are simmering in their juices. The smell of fresh bread from the oven begins to fill the space as she opens the door to check on it. My mouth is salivating. My stomach is growling. If there’s one thing I will miss, it’s Josie’s cooking. She’s a fantastic cook and uses herbs I’ve never heard of before.

  I lick my lips before my attention turns back to her brother.

  “We won’t bring the Council to the village, but that means you're responsible for whatever happens to Clarissa.”

  “We can protect her. I know we can,” Joel says.

  “Then mark my words. If she’s even scratched, I will find it. And when I do, I will slaughter someone from your village to atone for the hands laid on her.”

  “You will touch no one in the village,” he says.

  “We’ll make sure of it,” Theo bites.

  He casts me a glare, and I sit back on my haunches. Theo thinks he can contain me, but he won’t. He can’t. If Clarissa is harmed, I will count every injury on her body. I will take stock of every scratch and every bruise and every drop of blood. I will avenge every mark on her body left in anger or retribution, and hell help him if he tries to stop me.

  His head will be the first I tear from his body if Clarissa’s hurt in all this.

  “Can I address the elephant in the room?” Toshi asks.

  “What?” I ask.

  “Can we talk about what we’ll do if Clarissa finds us scheming behind her back?”

  Chapter 16

  Toshi

  It’s a good question and one that needs a decent answer. None of us have ever been good at hiding things from her, so I’m not sure what makes any of them think they can do it now. Joel is understandable. He doesn’t know Clarissa like we do. But I do feel a kindred spirit with him. I know he wants her. I can see it in his eyes whenever he looks at her. But he also knows he will never have her. He’s stuck longing for her from a distance because of the choices she’s made along the way.

  Like me.

  “She won’t find out,” Sebastian says. “All right?”

  “No. Not ‘all right.’ She always finds out. And that isn’t the Primal in Clarissa. That’s simply her. She’s a scientist at heart, and she doesn't stop until she finds the truth. She will find out about this, and she will erupt. What are we going to do then?” I ask.

  “It’s a good question,” Theo says.

  “But not one that needs to be discussed. Clarissa won’t find out because none of us will open our mouths,” Sebastian says.

  “Did you not hear what I just said? She’s a scientist. She finds the truth for a living,” I say.

  “And I’m telling you I know her best. She won’t find out,” Sebastian growls.

  “Whatever you say. But don’t come running to me to clean up your mess when it happens.”

  “Have you guys decided on what you’re going to do battle-wise?” Joel asks.

  “We’ll need to discuss it further,” Theo says. “But you have your plan. We aren’t driving you away from your village, so that’s all you need to know.”

  “What? You’re not going to even let me in on what you’re doing? I’m the one protecting Clarissa, remember?”

  “Yes, and the less you know, the less she’ll be willing to tear your face off when she finds out what’s happening,” Sebastian says.

  “I thought you said she wasn’t going to find out,” Joel says.

  “Idiot. She will once it’s happening. But it’ll be too late by then,” Sebastian says. “And to answer your question, I think a merging of both the plans is better.”

  “Of course, you do,” I say. “Something unique and original, but not really. Reeks of Wolf.”

  “Look. If we want to keep hiding this from Clarissa, then we need to make her part of some of our plans. If we take her out and lay her scent around then ask her to camouflage herself for the rest of the time, then it makes her think she’s part of the overall battle plan. It won’t be until all of us take the fight to the Council that we can keep her out of the fight, keep our promise, slaughter these assholes, and be done with this bullshit.”

  “It’s actually not a bad plan,” Joel says.

  “Nice to see you stand your ground well,” I say under my breath.

  “He’s not caving to me. He’s simply acknowledging a decent idea when he sees it,” Sebastian says.

  “Then it sounds like you guys have it all planned out. Come get me when it’s time for me to die for something I still don’t understand.”

  I stalk off from the guys and make my way back to my room. I don’t care if they keep talking or if they keep brainstorming plans. This entire thing is annoying. Everyone keeps bouncing from one thing to another without any regard to how anyone else feels. First, it was Africa and the emotional betrayal Clarissa went through. Then, it was all the idiotic things we got ourselves into with some stupid prophecy. After that, Clarissa chose Kyle and turned her back on all of us after everything we had done.

  Then Kyle died.

  Next, the Council happened, and Igo happened, and Hiro happened, and everything else happened. And not once do any of them think about slowing down. Not once do any of them think about the lives lost. Kyle and his former self. Clarissa and her former self. Gus. Hiro. The warriors of my race who turned their back on all of us.

  Penny.

  Oh, Penny.

  I slump down into my bed and curl up underneath the covers. I can still see the way she was pleading with Gus. With the blade of the katana threatening over her head and her words spewing from her mouth. She was looking wide-eyed into the gaze of her mate, trying to control his actions. But I could still see Gus’s gaze. Filled with anger and a blank stare that reeked of mind control. That was how Igo was controlling his warriors. It wasn’t due to some philosophy or moral code or want to protect anyone.

  It was due to his manipulation. His mind control.

  Very few Cats had ever been that strong. But Igo is the first to have ever abused it the way he did.

  My heart aches for all of them. For Penny and Gus’s death. For whatever Kyle has turned into. I know Clarissa’s being tugged in so many directions, and I know she’s keeping hope that Kyle will return and take her home. That she can continue with the life she saw for herself before it was so gruesomely ripped away from her on the night of her wedding.

  So much loss.

  And yet none of those idiots out there wish to acknowledge it.

  I miss Penny. I miss her playful banter and the way she annoyed Sebastian. I miss her endless flirtation with him and how it pissed him off. I miss the conversations I had with her and her unbridled passion for always speaking the truth. I miss her essence. Her aura. The positive emotions she would emit even though everything around us seemed as if it was spiraling out of control.

  And at the core of everything, there’s betrayal.

  From the very Primals I thought were embracing me.

  Sebastian and Theo had both laid with her during a time when she was emotionally vulnerable. Allowing themselves to succumb to her. Clarissa even went back for Sebastian twice. After I poured my heart out to her and promised her the world. That I could whisk her away and dive us into a
n endless abyss of wonder. I could give her what we had in Japan. The adventure and the laughter and the smiles and the moments that robbed us both of our breath. I was capable of that. I’m still capable of that.

  But she doesn't want it.

  Like Joel.

  I’m no better than Joel in her eyes, and even though it isn’t her fault, I can’t help but feel betrayed by her.

  I know Clarissa and I will never be together. I know I’m the last kind of man she would want to be with. I know the moment we save Kyle she will go running back for him. Running back to the life she always wanted before any of us came along. And if something happens with her and Kyle, then she’s got Sebastian and Theo. Two big, strong men who can keep her warm. Protect her. Provide for her in a way I know I can’t. I can give her laughter, sure. I can give her memories, yes. But I can’t give her what they can.

  I can’t command her. Dictate her. Force my way into her heart.

  At my core, I’m soft. Emotional. Bound to the world in a way that strokes my soul. I want to be one with it, not control it. I want to sink myself into the earth, not fight with it. I want to make love to Clarissa, not fuck her. I want to slowly roll myself into her, not crash her against a wall. Clarissa deserves tenderness. Romance. Compassion. Kindness.

  But she gravitates toward men who aren’t.

  I lay on my bed and stare up at the ceiling as all the guys continue to talk in the living room. If they aren’t careful, Clarissa will be able to hear them. I close my eyes and conjure her memory. The memories we both created in Japan. How wonderful she looked with the blossoms of the blooming trees falling around her. How nice it was to get drinks with her and laugh over stupid things. How luscious her waking sounds were as she filled her space with yawns and groans and sighs.

  Sounds I could wake up to for the rest of my life.

  Sounds I’ll never get to hear again.

  The only reason I’m here is for Clarissa. So I can prove to her that I’m worthy of the love she has to give. But she’s already chosen. Twice. And neither times it was me. And if given a third chance, she would probably choose Theo over me.

  Hell, she would probably choose Vlad over me.

  There’s no point in me staying. There are so many men vying for her attention she probably wouldn’t even realize I had disappeared. I close my eyes and conjure a plan. A plan to get out of this mess and go home. I have a hotel to run that I left in the arms of a good friend of mine, but I can’t expect her to run it forever. Eventually, I have to get back and get on with my life. Keep providing the hotel services I have to give and make a living for myself. This war has nothing to do with me. It doesn’t have anything to do with any of us. If Sebastian would’ve left well enough alone, none of us would have been put in this position. The Council would still think she didn’t exist, Clarissa would’ve gotten the normal life she wanted, and my heart wouldn’t be breaking.

 

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